It is Saturday night, the kids are in bed, clothes are set out for church in the morning, ironing is finished, lunch is set and I am so excited to be going to church tomorrow!!
For the past 2.5 years we have attended our local church which is only about 8 minutes from our home. We have been involved in anything and everything. At first it seemed like a great church that was really striving to grow. The deeper we began to get involved we began to hear and see things that we really struggled with. Four years ago the church split. A new pastor came and has been trying to make a huge difference in the church, but their are members there that are not interested in changing or growing. There are also many members there that want change and want growth. We struggled knowing what the Lord wanted us to do as a family...So we began praying, began searching and began to contemplate where the Lord wanted us. We talked about moving, we talked about full time ministry and we talked about changing churches. After a recent business meeting, I came home in tears and told Kevin that when he was ready I was ready. I believed that we were to change churches. We knew of one that really held our interest and were willing to give it a try. Kevin does not like change though. (who does) So I told him that when he was ready he just had to let me know! I would have our children and him ready to go to that new church.
So about 5 weeks ago...He said it was time. The next morning, we were all out the door on time (this church is about 30 minutes away) and actually excited for church. Something we haven't been in SO long. For about 2 months prior to this we started making excuses why not to go to church. BAD!!!!
So far so good...We love this church. It is small and continues to grow. I believe it has doubled in members since this pastor came 10 years ago. I may be a little off on my numbers for those of you who read my blog and are local.
Victoria continues to go to the preschool that is located at the previous church. Which is fine...But I have noticed that people are beginning to treat us differently and our daughter. hmmm....we have been told numerous times, that it is wrong to leave your local church. My question is, is it??? Is it wrong to not attend your local church if you feel it is no longer feeding you spiritually??
I want to continue to grow spiritually, and to see my children saved. While we were in PA, we stopped attending church faithfully and I am not interested in going down that road anymore!! I have enjoyed going to church over the past 2.5 years since we moved to IL and want to continue in that...help me please understand what I am feeling. Is that even possible???
For the past 2.5 years we have attended our local church which is only about 8 minutes from our home. We have been involved in anything and everything. At first it seemed like a great church that was really striving to grow. The deeper we began to get involved we began to hear and see things that we really struggled with. Four years ago the church split. A new pastor came and has been trying to make a huge difference in the church, but their are members there that are not interested in changing or growing. There are also many members there that want change and want growth. We struggled knowing what the Lord wanted us to do as a family...So we began praying, began searching and began to contemplate where the Lord wanted us. We talked about moving, we talked about full time ministry and we talked about changing churches. After a recent business meeting, I came home in tears and told Kevin that when he was ready I was ready. I believed that we were to change churches. We knew of one that really held our interest and were willing to give it a try. Kevin does not like change though. (who does) So I told him that when he was ready he just had to let me know! I would have our children and him ready to go to that new church.
So about 5 weeks ago...He said it was time. The next morning, we were all out the door on time (this church is about 30 minutes away) and actually excited for church. Something we haven't been in SO long. For about 2 months prior to this we started making excuses why not to go to church. BAD!!!!
So far so good...We love this church. It is small and continues to grow. I believe it has doubled in members since this pastor came 10 years ago. I may be a little off on my numbers for those of you who read my blog and are local.
Victoria continues to go to the preschool that is located at the previous church. Which is fine...But I have noticed that people are beginning to treat us differently and our daughter. hmmm....we have been told numerous times, that it is wrong to leave your local church. My question is, is it??? Is it wrong to not attend your local church if you feel it is no longer feeding you spiritually??
I want to continue to grow spiritually, and to see my children saved. While we were in PA, we stopped attending church faithfully and I am not interested in going down that road anymore!! I have enjoyed going to church over the past 2.5 years since we moved to IL and want to continue in that...help me please understand what I am feeling. Is that even possible???
12 comments:
Heather,
I say heartily that your family is NOT in the wrong for "leaving the local church" (as it was said to you).
First of all, you and Kevin are responsible for the spiritual well-being of your family - NOT other church members. You both need to pray and ask the Lord for wisdom and direction, not anyone else. So to see God change both yours and Kevin's hearts about where to attend church sounds like God's clear leading. (Not to mention the spirit of a church to give you that attitude . . . do they think that condemnatory and guilt-ladening attitude is going to win your family back?!?)
Second, we know from experience that it's EXTREMELY difficult to find a church with strong Biblical teaching these days. It took us about 8 months to try out all the churches in our local area (Baptist, Bible, Southern Baptist, Presbyterian). Boy was that a horrid and saddening experience!
We attend a church that's a 45 minute drive from home but the time doesn't bother us because we both LOVE the teaching of our pastor. And we enjoy the music and nursery ministries of our church. It's a great fit for us and we're so thankful that God lead us to it.
What's awkward is that in our town there's a BJU grad who planted a church about 8 years ago and he's an acquaintance of my husband. When we first moved to the area, they invited us and we tried it several times. Now that we've chosen not to attend their church they're pretty cold to us and give us that some tension that your old church family is dishing out. When I run into them, I pray God gives me an attitude of love and kindness towards them despite their attitudes towards us!
Sorry for leaving such a hugely long post. :) You probably know by now what a long-winded gal I am. I just wanted to encourage you that your family is NOT ALONE!
Much love dear sister in Christ,
Alicia
heather,
I echo Alicia. You and Kevin need to do what's best for your family. If you all have prayerfully considered what God would have you to do and have felt his leading - then no one can argue with that.
I know that it is difficult to go to church sometimes, but my encouragement would be to you as a close friend to be faithful no matter how hard it may be, no matter how much you would rather not go. I know that you don't want things to get like they did here in PA. The best example you can be to your kids is to be faithful.
So, Praise the Lord that He led you to a great church that is thriving and that you desire to go to. We lived 2 minutes from the church I grew up at and now my mom has been travelling to a church 45 minutes away for over 10 years. It's not always easy (or cost effective :) But God blesses faithfulness and our children benefit from
benefit from it more than we will ever know.
I love you and I am praying for you guys!! It's so good to see a post from you. Your kids are beautiful and they are getting so big!!
(sorry for the chopped up post, Jackson decided that i needed to end it! :)
SEE YA
Hi Heather,
As someone who knows exactly all that is going on over here, let me say that we respect your decision. Thank you to Kevin for taking the time to talk to my husband the other day.
You are not wrong if you are doing something that you feel is best for your family. What would be wrong would be to give up on spiritual things totally due to a situation that you did not like in any church.
Sorry I have not called but I know how busy you have been with tax season, and I did not want to "butt in" where I wasn't wanted/needed.
Perhaps some of the reason some have not responded correctly to your decision is emotional. You are missed, and that is a good thing. Of course, I do not know what responses you have had, but many people try to ignore situations they are not comfortable with, which is, of course, wrong. I guess I am babbling.
My point is, we miss you and your family, but support your decision as you are responsible for the training and spiritual growth of your family, and the decisions that you make are your business alone. Leaving a church is not wrong, provided you do not leave church all together. That is part of learning and growing. No church is perfect, believe me, I know because I have been around, but I do believe there is a perfect church for any family, and you have to be where you find your fit.
Give us a hey when things calm down. We want to have you guys over!
Nicole H.
Heather, I can't say anything that hasn't already been said, so I'll say this - I'll be praying for your family!!!
You need to go where the Lord leads you and Kevin to go. He gave you the desire to go to that other church for a reason. You need to put the spiritual needs of you and your children first. That does take courage to make changes like that. I am thankful that you have found a church that is feeing you! We miss you guys! Love, Kelli & Heston
You need to go where the Lord leads you and Kevin to go. He gave you the desire to go to that other church for a reason. You need to put the spiritual needs of you and your children first. That does take courage to make changes like that. I am thankful that you have found a church that is feeing you! We miss you guys! Love, Kelli & Heston
You need to go where the Lord leads you and Kevin to go. He gave you the desire to go to that other church for a reason. You need to put the spiritual needs of you and your children first. That does take courage to make changes like that. I am thankful that you have found a church that is feeing you! We miss you guys! Love, Kelli & Heston
I agree with them all...so important to go where GOD is leading you. The most important thing is to worship God and watch your family grow spiritually. I pray you have found the church that is right for your family. Take care. Adorable pics too
I'm praying for you Heather. Chris and I have had to make decisions like that that are hard and emotional for others (and us, in ways). But, it is SO important to us to go to a church where we are thriving, learning and really feel like we are able and helped to worship Christ. We have been so blessed to find great churches wherever we've moved... Blessings - katie
Thanks for the comments, suggestions and prayer! One think I want to make very clear is that I love the people at our old church. We had so many close friends and enjoyed all that we did with them. We miss them so much and maybe one day we will be able to worship with them again!!!
Heather-
I know we talk all the time, and see each other on a regular basis, but I thought I'd give a bit of encouragement anyway. I think we're going through the same emotions/feelings regarding church because we're going through the same thing. I'm so thankful though that we all get to continue going to church together-just in a different location! I think there is much opportunity in Beloit, and we can all see each other grow and help each other along! Love you guys! Melissa*
Post a Comment